How

I have been asked via e-mail and received some comments about my age and early retirement. Someone even had the audacity to insinuate that I am independently wealthy. That was a comment I deleted and chuckled about. So how did a person on the downhill side of 40 ends up in a RV and traveling down the road. It is quite simple.

My father had cerebral palsy. The doctors told my grandmother that he was retarded and needed to be institutionalized. Keep in mind he was born in 1930. He was raised by his grandmother. He was sent to private schools because of his disability and wasn’t until he demanded to be mainstreamed in high school that he was allowed in public schools. His gait was awkward, his speech hard to understand but he was a people person and people responded well to him. His grades reflect his intelligence. He later married my mom and started his own business.

When he was 50 he was diagnosed with peripheral neurothapy. It was then that he was confined to a wheelchair. Add neck surgery, arthritis, and other ailments that age gives us and he started depending on my mother more and more. He was also scared to be left alone and no one can blame him for being afraid. So my mother found herself over time, becoming more and more housebound. The last five years of his life it took the two of us to care for him. His mind was sharp but his body had deteriorated to the point that he was no longer able to take care of his most basic needs. My mother left the house for a couple of hours to shop once a week.

When he was hospitalized May 2005, the doctor told us that we could no longer care for him. He would have to be put in a nursing home. It wasn’t because he was receiving poor care. We took outstanding care of him; it was simply the care he would require went beyond what we could do for him. This upset mom and I more than his passing. We promised him that he wouldn’t go into nursing home. We did everything we could to prevent this. Like I said earlier his body was weak but his mind was strong. He wouldn’t survive in a nursing home. His passing became a blessing simply because he wasn’t in a nursing and we fulfilled our promise to him.

My mother had basically become housebound for 20+ years. When she asked if I would become her caregiver and quit my secure job I jumped at the opportunity. I worked for years in the “welfare office.” I figure if I ended up on the welfare line then at least I have an advantage. That is why I am here today in Kentucky. I traded in my Sebring for a Vue and a Gulfstream. The Vue I could handle the Gulfstream was a different matter. After hitting the tree I became more relaxed about driving it. I sold my house and got rid of everything I owned. It started out as gift to my mother. Somewhat of a “martyr” statement you say? Let me tell you what started out as a gift to my mother has ended up becoming a gift my mother gave me.