Roscoe was a sleek, hardback, handsome beetle three inches long. He was a modern day hobo. He walked from town to town until he hitch a ride in a little house on wheels, which took him, places he only dreamed of. He lived there for 3 months before he was called home. During that time, he grew about 1 inch, took up residency under the toilet, and acquired the name of Roscoe. His favorite activities were scurrying under the feet of those who were doing their morning mediation, leaping off the counter, and hiding behind the trash can. He thrived on scaring the beJesus out of the two women who resided with him. One of them snapped and ended his life. No charges will be made since it was justifiable homicide.
Since he was a hobo, his exact age cannot be determined. Since he was an insect we can safely assume that he left behind multitudes of children, the residents of the little house on wheels hope he left no one behind.
He was given a simple burial, wrapped in a shroud made by the finest company (Brawny Inc.), and laid to rest in a large receptacle. He will be missed by all but not by the two women who resided with him.
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